Great comments on my "Why" posting

Thank you all for your great insight on the posting about asking God "why"..

Great stuff...thanks.

Stepping up

From what I've seen in life, the character of a person is exposed by the challenges that meet them on a day to day basis. Some folks curl up in a ball when faced with adversity, some step up and meet it head on and kick adversities butt.

Well, as some of you may be aware, my wife and oldest daughter went on vacation to Ar. recently. That left my 2nd oldest "in charge" since I did not take time off from work that week. My mom flew in from Tx. to lend a hand and was a huge help, but, my 2nd oldest was amazing. Chores were done, babies kept, soccer games attended. Basically, life continued in our household as "normal"..

I suppose that is a testament to her mothers training as well! Our #2 daughter, (and her great helpers LB and CT) really showed their maturity and put their mommas training into work. Truly a thing of beauty!

Great job #2!! (and helpers!!)

Stitches answer revealed....

One of the funny things as we were in the emergency room... The nurse asks, "on a scale of 0 to 10, how would you rate the pain?". LB looks at me, shrugs her shoulders, looks back at the nurse and says, "0".

Is it wrong to ask why?

Yesterday, Steven Curtis Chapman's (christian music artist) oldest son accidentally ran over and killed his youngest daughter. This is a horrible tragedy regardless of the fame of the family it happened to. What would Steven say to his oldest son? How would he feel about him? How does his oldest son feel? How long will he feel it? How about most of the family as they watch it happen? What do they feel toward the son that accidentally did this?

Hopefully, they rallied around him, prayed for him, was honest with him, and can support him.

However, why does this happen? Won't most people wonder how and why that happens to someone? Especially a family that proudly proclaims their love for God..?.. Why would God let that happen?

Does He let things happen or do we choose these things? Not every victim is protected from the one that assaults them. Not every believer in God is immune from the sinful (or accidental, in this case) actions of others. There is sometimes a hedge of protection around believers and sometimes not. Sometimes non-believers are protected and sometimes not. Is it fair to ask of God, "why?"

We are not puppets, we are not pieces on a game board of life. Just because God knows the number of our days doesn't mean that when the final day arrives, God is the one pulling the trigger. People are free. Free to hate God. Free to be ignorant. Free to make mistakes. Free to do whatever they want to. Free to love their mom and dad or free to hate them. That same freedom for us to choose is what makes it real when you love God. Because we aren't pawns, but have choices, is the only way that relationships are real. Right? You choose to love your wife. You choose to stay in that relationship. If you choose not to you are free to do so.

But, in the freedom of choosing there are consequences to those actions. If you are free to choose to kill someone, you are a slave to the consequence of that action. If you choose to be sweet to your wife, there may be very favorable consequences...or not depending on what she is free to choose to do in reaction to that. (And we all know how inconsistent women's decisions can be!! ;-) )

So, is God really the one to ask why? Did God do it? Does He allow it? Or, is the consequence of a world of free choices...slavery? Steven Curtis Chapman's son was free to be as careful or careless as he wanted to be. The 5 year old that was run over was free to be in harms way or not. The sum of the total of those freedoms equal a tragedy in this formula. Is it God's fault? Or in our freedoms do these things occasionally and sadly happen?

What are your thoughts?

Stitches

Let see how well you know my family. 1 of my kids had to go get stitches in their face tonight. Here's how it happened.

The oldest boy had soccer practice. The individual that needs stitches was on top of one of the soccer goal posts. That's right, on top of it. When this individual was climbing down, they bumped their face on the top corner causing a cut about a quarter inch across on the bridge of their nose.

Who am I talking about?

Idol?

Let's just say a couple of thing first 1. My oldest 3 boys play outstanding soccer. They work at it and are very crafty with the ball. 2. I LOVE watching them play. 3. Soccer has become a part of our family. 4. It's our entertainment even when we just hang out together.

Ok. I think you have ample information about that. Well, as anything in life can become, something that you love can consume your thoughts and time. The funny thing is that you have no idea that you're so addicted. But, then something happens and it's exposed. It's usually VERY ugly and disturbing.

Here's the story:

We have been having a little difficulty getting my oldest boy to think beyond just what he's specifically told to do. In addition, we are trying to establish a good work ethic in him. We feel that if he wants to continue playing soccer at the high level he's playing and the commitment of time for the family, that he should have a regimen that he performs to get better as his end of the "deal" to play. We have a 7 minute drill that is a great footwork drill that provides several hundred touches in (you guessed it) 7 minutes. He also has to do push ups, sit ups, etc. to keep up his skills and prove to us that this is something that he really wants to do. (Essentially, that he would want it bad enough that he'll work on it outside of scheduled practices) the consequence for not doing it is losing it.

Well, as any 12 (wow he's already 12...time is passing way too quickly) year old would do...he didn't complete the regimen for quite a while. I have always made an attempt to allow him to keep playing as long as we saw improvements. Well, a few weeks ago, we told him that I wasn't going to remind him anymore and that it really had to be his desire...not mine. He did well for a couple of weeks from what I could tell. He even played better during the games in that time period when he was really putting out an extra effort at home. It did not last as long as I would have liked. As chance would have it, he was getting a lecture regarding a similar matter that wasn't soccer so I threw out the question, "Are you doing your 7 minute drills?" He had no idea how badly I hoped he was doing them. 3v3 season starts in a couple of weeks and I am really excited about having 2 boys playing competitively this summer. Unfortunately, he said "Nope, not for the last couple of days."

My heart sank. I immediately said that he could not play 3v3 this summer. After all, that was the arrangement and leniency on other matters was what caused all the questions in the 1st place. It was time to be firm. What happened next shocked me. I was so saddened and disappointed that I lost it. I balled about it....right there in front of everyone. I felt like I was the one getting punished. In a sense, I was. It's so a part of us that I love watching them. The wife said that I was upset because I was losing my entertainment. Maybe so, but I found myself thinking things like, "how far behind will this make him" "can we punish him a different way?" That was when I discovered that I was too into it. An idol had been formed and I was worshipping it without even knowing it. God is good to reveal such things!

I feel like I need some sort of 12 step program to get over this!

Wow.

My wife and oldest daughter

In a matter of days two of the most important women in my life will be heading on a plane to Arkansas. I ask that you pray for their safety on the journey and a hasty return! They are very excited to go see all their friends and attend what will undoubtedly be a beautiful wedding.

Godspeed ladies. Have fun!

Rotten day...

I made a mess of the day. It was rotten. The kids were great in forgiving me.

I need to be more concerned with pleasing the Lord than pleasing myself...It's always better when I do.

1 year last week

I have been in Colorado 1 year last week. I just realized that it has also been 1 year without accountability and I am struggling. Greg/Brandon if you're reading this, I really miss you guys. However, God has put a couple of men in my life that may be exactly what I need. More to come.

Ok, here's more. I had been struggling with pride and how my oldest sons soccer team is being coached. A lot of it is that I think I could do a better job. The assistant coach (last years head coach) and I had lunch. We had a long chat and I really opened up to him about how I was struggling with this. He had some very Godly advice and confirmed some stuff that my wife and I had discussed the night before. It was like God used that encounter to validate some of the things that had been revealed. It's just amazing to me that He (God) is so awesome, huge, wonderful, powerful, etc. yet can work out little details like that in my life.

Secondly, I attended a seminar taught by Henry Blackaby. Every time he talks, I get convicted. Funny thing is, it's usually about something that's going on in my life right then. He's not a hell and brimstone type of preacher but a very cerebral speaker and teacher. I guess that's why he's Dr. Henry Blackaby. I love how when he speaks, he's usually just saying what scripture says. So, it's not like HB is twisting your arm or trying to convince you of something. He just reiterates scripture and explains it in a real simple yet intellectual and thought out manner. I really admire Dr. Blackaby for simply speaking truth.

Finally, I met with our pastor today. Had a great lunch. We discussed many potential opportunities for my family in service for God and the church. It's pretty exciting but at the same time pretty scary. Anything that we would commit to would be just that...a commitment. I don't think that the Lord would want it any other way. And with our family, soccer, work that needs to be done on the house, occupations, home schooling, my failures, etc. I need to make sure our priorities are aligned. So, I need to pray this through and not just get excited and do the church and our family a great disservice by over committing. I am sure I'll post more on this later.

Oh yeah, the wife and I had a great talk. We discussed how to build relationships with our kids so that when they are older, they will still request advice or seek counsel from us. That we would be able to speak with them in truth and love knowing that their best interests are on our hearts. We kind of concluded that we can do that by 1. Not demoralizing them now (do not exasperate your children). 2. Do not be angry and fly off the handle (in your anger, do not sin) 3. Encourage them (build others up)

Isn't it amazing that we spent a couple of hours coming up with that ( I realize that it is probably painfully obvious to some...but, the wifey and I have to work these things out, out loud. Especially, when I am failing in all 3 of those things right now and the wife has to break it to me) and it's been in scripture for thousands of years? Kind of funny how a book that so many people view as antiquated and not relevant can be so...amazingly right on.

Interesting question

This weekend our pastor asked a very interesting question. "If you could pick one thing that you would love to do but haven't done, what would it be?" If I recall correctly it had to do with really pursuing something to excellence. At least that's how I took it.

One of the things that constantly pops up in my head is that I am too old to begin something. What a stupid thing to think. The pastor had a great story that aligned with this thinking. When he was young his granddad said there was this thing that he had always wanted to learn to do, but he was too old then and didn't take it on. After all, he was in his early 60's. His grandfather recently died....he was 98. How well do you think you could do at something given 38 years? Well, if you start now...that's one day of doing it that you would have never had having not tried.

So, how does this apply to me. I have a lot of housework to do. Not, cleaning and such, but remodeling and finishing. I don't know how to do any of it...Now would be a great time to learn.
I want to help the churches music ministry...I bought drums (that's where the need is) and I am going to learn. I also want to be a better "studier". Have an in depth knowledge of my faith. Be a better dad and husband. Be a better son and son in law. Those things are worthy of my time and starting them now would be a good thing.

If I live to be 60 that would still be 20 years of having enjoyed those things that I want to do. I just have to get started.

How about you...anything you wish you could/should start?

Some of my favorite pictures...

Flick on header by Kitch

J-Man Juke...

JD looking up...

Z is 1

Mayf is happy, as usual.

Girls to come.....

"Steve ain't fun"

This title is a funny saying. It's what my little boys would blurt out harmoniously given some certain circumstance that I couldn't figure out. We'd be playing soccer and someone would be tearing after the ball..in unison the boys would yell out "Steve ain't fun". I would stop and look at them quizzically. What the heck are you boys talking about. Who's Steve??? The 2 little boys would just look at each other, snicker and then say it again. For weeks this went on. I was clueless. Finally, my oldest son said it. Or, kind of said it with them. However, he doesn't have the preschooler lisp and slurs...He said "Steve ate Vern". Suddenly weeks of playing street soccer made sense. Almost too quickly I recalled all the instances of the "Steve ain't fun" incidences. It almost made me fall down from laughing so hard.

Well, it seems that every time the ball went slamming into this over sized bush on the corner, the yelling of "Steve ain't fun" proceeded from their mouths. A German war camp sized light bulb went off in my head. (Of course, it took someone with a clear dialect to help me) There is a video that we have called "Over the Hedge". There is a scene where the group of animals (led by Vern) find this huge hedge. Of course, they don't know what it is so they name the hedge Steve. Vern, being the leader is examining the huge bush when he falls into the bush. With the appearance that the hedge (aka Steve) swallowed Vern whole, the other animals yell out "Steve ate Vern!". Obviously, my boys mixed up what they said a bit...But, thinking about it...if the little animals yelled "Steve ain't fun" after their leader was swallowed up..."Steve ain't fun" would also fit.

So, of course, whenever you are playing soccer and the ball bounces into a bush everyone 7 and under should yell, "Steve ain't fun". I know I will from now on.

Why is it new?

So, I was having a conversation with this Japanese guy. He's a consultant for a VMWare installation. Somehow, the conversation came to kids. He has a beautiful little 2 yo girl. He was asking wise father type questions like, when do you potty train, etc. He was a pretty humble dude. One of the things he said was, "I had asked a lot of people what it was like to be a parent. Everyone always mentioned the bad stuff except my dad." Wow, what a dad he had. I wonder how special that made him feel to know his dad felt that way. Anyway, as the conversation turned from one topic to another I made some comment about a-bu-bah...that's how my Korean mom says, "put your baby on your back and secure him with a blanket then walk around and he'll fall asleep". How true it is. Babies love it and are typically fast asleep in minutes. We talked about the simplicity of it and how old the idea was....then we talked about how companies are selling these strap on things as the latest craze in baby comfort....I guess the consumer public is easily blinded and has very short memories.

I was thinking that I might market horses as alternatives to cars and call them "green animals" (for all the green freaks out there) since they don't really use non-replaceable fuels and make a fortune! The latest NEW thing, right?