Where did it go?

Where did my desire to learn go? I heard a statistic one time that talked about how adults stop learning at about my age…27 ;-) actually…the stat was something like 42. An ancient age. I am finding that I am slipping into that stat. I am getting “set in my ways”. I definitely do not want that. I guess the biggest battles of this is two-fold.

 

1.       I think that all I need to know I know and the rest is irrelevant..

2.       You end up thinking that everyone else is wrong all the time!

 

I know many people like this and I always wondered why it was so easy for me to spot them. Typically, the thing that you identify and that which repulses you the most is a blind spot that is unknowingly owned by the one that is repulsed. For so many years I hated that dumb childish saying that goes something like, “when you point at someone else, there are 3 fingers pointing back at you!” na – na – na – na –na

 

But, really, doesn’t even scripture say the same thing? Something about a spec and a plank…I think you know the story.

 

How do I regain that hunger? How do I remove that humility costume and make it permanent? It’s kind of difficult to explain but I think it’s a common occurrence with many different things…people often 1^st desire wholeheartedly to have something like humility, then they get pretty good at doing it, then they become proud of how humble they are, then it becomes an inner thing that says – “yeah, you don’t know me…I am the humblest guy around, just ask anybody.” Sheesh, that’s DE-SCUSTIN.

 

There have been a lot of things going on in life right now that has helped me to identify this shortcoming – one was thinking that my life it getting busy and difficult, but “handlin it”. But, the other day I emailed an old friend back home and found out what struggling really was. Man, I am sad for him. A vast and sudden realization that my world had become centered around me.

 

And the problem is this
We were bought with a kiss
But the cheek still turned
Even when it wasn't hit

And I don't know
What to do with a love like that
And I don't know
How to be a love like that

When all the love in the world
Is right here among us
And hatred too
And so we must choose
What our hands will do

Where there is pain
Let there be grace
Where there is suffering
Bring serenity
For those afraid
Help them be brave
Where there is misery
Bring expectancy
And surely we can change
Surely we can change
Something

And the problem it seems
Is with you and me
Not the Love who came
To repair everything

Where there is pain
Let us bring grace
Where there is suffering
Bring serenity
For those afraid
Let us be brave
Where there is misery
Let us bring them relief
And surely we can change
Surely we can change
Oh surely we can change
Something

Oh, the world's about to change
The whole world's about to change

 

 

Waiting

While I'm Waiting :
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord

 

That pretty much sums up my life right now – there are so many irons in the fire. But, I will wait upon the Lord to make a way. I will wait for an answer. His timing is perfect and His ways are so far above mine. I will wait.

 

Standing

Standing for what you believe in is destined for ridicule especially if you're 13. My son is a fine example of a warrior for the Lord. In recent events, his soccer coach was fired. The coaches boss had asked the boys "who thinks he (the coach) should be fired?" Apparently, Christian was the only one to raise his hand. And, he was right to do so. The kids haven't stopped ragging him since. He now gets frequent comments like, "the new coach said a bad word, do you hate HIM now?" And "God wants you to pass the ball!"

What do I tell my son? I am definitely proud of him for choosing correctly. He understands scripture about standing firm..his reward is in heaven for that one for sure! But, how does he talk to the boys that do that? If I had my way he'd be talking to them but they wouldn't be able to talk back due to their jaws being wired shut from the fracture I would have recently given them. But, obviously that's not the way. I plan on speaking to him about it tomorrow and discuss his mother's advice in more detail. See, he talked to his mom about it...I love that he does that. What a good little man.

This morning I read the beattitudes again. Matt 5 -7 has tons of relevant goodness for him. However, as I was showering another thought came to me...have I explained well enough the parents actions toward the coach? See, if we wanted him gone because we hated him, well, obviously that's the wrong reason. The primary reason we (as believers) discipline, is love. When my son messes up and needs correction, the correction is for his benefit in the long run. I discipline him because I love him. It's all throughout scripture. It's the same with the coach. He needed correction for many reasons, but primarily to help him understand that the responsibility he had as a coach should outweigh anything else when he is to be acting as coach. We want him to be prepared in any future engagements that he should have so that other parents will not encounter the same things we did.

Perhaps we'll have a heart to heart tonight.

Things my son should know;

I have his best interest at heart

I think he's becoming quite a great little man

I am proud of him

He's courageous in the Lord

He's a wonderful son

I love him

His mother loves him

God loves him more

He can always talk to me - even when I am angry or he is angry

Ouch!

Z-boy split his eyebrow open on the wooden side part of the bed. Of course, I was wrestling with him at the time...so, I feel pretty guilty. He was so tough though. He cried just for a minute...then when I got the blood pretty much cleaned off of his face, and put a bandaid or 2 on it, he was good to go. The wound was gaping so I was a little concerned. It definitely could use a few stitches and it's right on his eyebrow. But, we threw a butterfly on it and we are hoping for the best. We called Nana... She's our official, "is this a serious injury?" answer lady. She said it "should" be fine. So, we're going with that.


Here's a picture of our little tough guy...

FLIP OUT!!!

One of the kids past times lately has been spending hours at a time on the twamwene. (Baby-est's version of the word)...

Check out some of the fun...

Wii age

If you don't have a gaming console called the Wii you probabaly have no idea what this is. It is a measurement where it states youir fitness age by using the game over a series of tests. The first test is a tennis simulation and it pops 50 balls out at you and you have to return them. Then you hit home runs, then bowl a certain number of balls. I have considered myself fairly active and "young" for my age. Ii totally expected to fool this game. It measures agility, balance, and strength....

I was wrong. It actually put my age at 1 year OLDER than I actually am. Needless to say, we are taking that piece of junk back to the store! ;-)

There are some smart people in this world...amazing what they come up with.
Test everything. Hold fast to what is good.

Bad day

What a poor day. Starts by taking my wife to the airport way to early in the morning. It's like adding insult to injury. I don't want her gone in the first place, now I have to do it really early... Oh well, she's definitely worth it!

So, I am fairly tired all day and generally short tempered. I find other flaws too, but, I'll have to discuss those later...the issue at hand, is my temper.

Here are things I don't understand, after repeatedly saying to the boys, 'don't leave your socks outside'. I still see socks outside. Now, some may say simple mistake...Those that know me at all know that mistakes are something that should be corrected and fast. So, repeatedly saying something is beyond grace in my line of thinking...then, I ask the STOOPiDEst question ever (it's actually one i ask too often). "Why is there a sock outside?!?!!?" Blank looks from everyone and a concerted "We don't know". I really hate those 4 words and i think they know that. I think they say it to spite me. Anyway, the cow patty hit the fan. Everyone is in trouble, the sky fell, the hammer dropped, etc. They picked the wrong day to try to get away with something...normally, it wouldn't bother me as bad. Plus, don't you hate it when you see your kids perform with half hearted effort and a general lack of understanding for what's going on? me too.

But, now it's quiet. Everyone is in bed and nobody is saying anything. It's a sad quiet. I think every kid in the house shed a tear today. It's a bad day. Kind of like you wish that this kind of thing happened in the morning so you could have the day to have it wear off instead of everyone going to bed "in trouble".

Maybe tomorrow will be better. It'll probably rain though.

Saturday Services

As they approach it is becoming quite nerve racking. I am feeling fairly unconfident in many things since we don’t really have the staff that we need for everything. But, as one of my good friends stated, that leaves God the room to get the glory! I just want it to be like I want it to be. That’s probably a very bad thing to want…I really need to pray about this more!

One thing that is going to help is for me to sit down and completely plan out the service order from start to finish. Seeing it will help me identify the holes.

Can you guys think of topics in regards to worship? What would you like to see, hear, experience?

No Thanks

"Z boy, put that dangerous thing down" - "No, thanks"

"Z, stop being mean to somebody" - "No thanks!"

"Z, you are going to have to be punished" - "No thanks"

Yep, he's 2 and so polite in his disobedience! :-)

Sometimes I do what I want, the rest of the time I do what I have to.

The title is a quote from a movie. A general has asked his personal servant about “doing his duty” and it was his response. So many times I find that I have a great conflict with these 2 things: What I want to do and what I have to do. Typically, I try to arrange my life to increase the first by successfully managing the latter. It has been somewhat successful. However, when it’s not it really causes grief to me and those closest to me.  As I try to think of this from a biblical standpoint I really can’t recall anything that helps me. There are standard answers like, “Seek ye first” and Paul’s struggle with the same issue…but nothing that’s practical that someone can grasp and try to apply. How do you grasp and apply, “My yoke is easy my burden is light”? My old pastor had a way with answering such questions…but, as of late I haven’t found solace in any answers from any person. It’s probably time to expand and stretch myself and start really contemplating more on the depths of scripture. The underlying meaning of what it means to “cast your cares upon Him”.  There is a verb in that sentence. There is an action for us to take.